Listening to: Faye Wong - Hong2 Dou4

And Then There Were Two... Sun 3rd February
You'll never know how much a message from you means to me... even if it doesn't have anything to do with us... it never had anything to do with us... whether it appears late at night or early in the morning, it brings back so, so many unbidden memories... I treasure messages from my friends, every single one of them, because they remind me that I'm never really alone, and it's only by my choice that keeps them at that distance... yours... yours makes me feel so achingly lonely. Perhaps you'll chide me, for clinging on so tightly to the past... but I'd like to call myself... sentimental? That's what you used to called me... but you'll never know.

I sent a message to my gf-who-never-was today... all I got was a single reply from her, telling me that she hadn't updated her phone list and how was life. It hurts I guess, especially since once upon a time not so long ago, a mutual friend had proclaimed us to be perfect for each other - temperament, character, moods, general nattiness, even height and look-wise. A festering wound that'll never close because there never will be a chance for me to bring it to its logical conclusion... you3 yuan2 wu2 fen4. It does feel better nowadays of course... especially when I receive SMSs from people who make me feel achingly lonely, and it provides temporary respite - or otherwise - from thoughts of you. Yours makes me sigh over a beautiful, perfect, friendship at least, that has been torn and scattered to the four winds, a seed never given a chance to grow...

My best friend would take it all in, grin and just lean on me.

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